September 1, 2021

A Little Kindness Goes a Long Way

 REPOST from former blog My Type 2 Diabetic Life ©


March 6, 2020

Have you ever noticed that when you get sick, or there's some kind of drama in your life, people tend to give you all sorts of unsolicited advice or stories about their own experiences?  I'm going to sort of step away from the physical health perspective of diabetes, and slide over to the emotional side for today.  

Image credit: Unknown

For the past several years, I have been making a conscious effort when someone tells me their troubles, to not make the kind of comments that turn the conversation to all about me, and I certainly don’t want to criticize someone who is reaching out for help.  I am focusing on trying to be a better listener and a friend.  

When I was first diagnosed and would ask questions, I got all sorts of advice from people – some were people I knew, and some were even total strangers.  As a natural skeptic, I usually let unsolicited advice go in one ear and out the other.  But that’s just me.  Sometimes, even when you ask for advice, it can be crushing, if it is delivered in the wrong manner.  

In an effort to find out as much information as possible, I followed several diabetic groups on various social media outlets when I was first diagnosed.  (This was in addition to my reading and researching.). I wanted to see real stories by real people.  What I wasn’t expecting was to see adults bullying other adults.  It was shocking, to put it mildly.  Instead of finding a sympathetic ear, people were being put down for anything from the type of medication that they were taking to whether or not they were active, or if they were overweight.  There were so many comments that were critical and even downright cruel.  I quit following multiple social media groups because  of the bullying that I saw.  It was definitely enough to make a person not want to be a part of that community, at best, and I can’t even imagine how someone who had low self esteem might feel.

I even experienced bullying via social media myself when I posted the nutrition information on a recipe that I adjusted to fit my diabetes.  One lady went out of her way to write SIXTY-TWO comments directed at ME, that the nutrition information was incorrect. (yes, I counted them!)  Never mind that the nutrition label was created from a website based on the data gleaned from the  USDA’s Food and Nutrient Databases, which is what food corporations use to create nutrition labels for the foods we see in our grocery.  This lady went out of her way to criticize.  (Even though I knew the nutrition was correct.)  She picked and picked so much, that I finally deleted my post to get her to leave me alone.  She simply went on to the next person and started bullying that person.  It was at that point that I decided that lady must be a very unhappy person, so she makes herself feel better by bullying people.

Yesterday, I was saddened when I read a comment in another online community – one that I really like, by the way – written by a person who was afraid to even tell friends of a diabetic diagnosis out of fear of being criticized and “blamed” for causing the condition.  Maybe that person did contribute to their diabetes by a poor diet and lack of exercise.  But maybe that person has the genetic markers for diabetes, and it may be inevitable that it would develop.  It is a very sad day in that person’s life when they can’t even confide in FRIENDS, in hope of receiving some moral support.

Negative opinions of others can weigh heavily on your shoulders, but that’s not going to help. Focus on yourself and what you need to do to be healthy and happy. Surround yourself with people who are supportive. I don’t mind telling most people that I am diabetic, but there are some that I don’t mention it to at all.  You only have to share your life with folks that you feel comfortable with.  (I can’t believe I’m going to end that sentence with a preposition, but I just did, so there! 😜)

Image: WordArt created by My Type 2 Diabetic Life © 2020


Now I’ll get off my soapbox.  What’s the purpose of my post today?  

Kindness is an art, and it comes in many forms — a listening ear, a hug, a smile, buying a stranger a cup of coffee, holding the door open for someone, doing a favor for someone, saying thank you, a compliment, an encouraging note, liking a post, inclusion, courtesy, compassion, friendship, acceptance, moral support, empathy, and so much more.  Kindness goes a long way.  We should all strive to be the friend that listens to and supports others.  And we should all practice a little more kindness, and a little less judgement.  

Thanks for stopping by to read my blog.  I hope you’ll subscribe (on the bottom of the page), so that you can follow my blog.   I’m working on a post about diabetic remission for next time.  So until the next post, be well, and BE KIND.  ❤️  

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